Unresolved Conflict is Dangerous

PRAY OVER THIS

“So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.” James 1:19

 

PONDER THIS

Why do we retreat in the face of conflict? Several reasons. Sometimes we fear the anger of another, so we just close up. Sometimes we may think, “If I don’t retreat, our relationship will be broken.” Sometimes, and I suppose this is the most insidious of all, we retreat because we’re afraid that if we get into an argument and a discussion, we will have to admit something about ourselves. We might have to see where we are wrong, and so we just retreat.

But unresolved conflict is not resolved by retreating; it only gets worse. You may stuff it down, you may repress it, but I will guarantee your stomach will keep the score. If you have a problem that you shove out the front door and refuse to address, it will crawl around the house and come in the basement window. Don’t practice avoidance. Love others enough to confront. The ability to confront reveals the strength of a relationship. Good communication in relationships begins with listening.

Who are you frequently in conflict with? How do you typically handle conflict with that person?

Why do you think we often struggle with listening during conflict?

PRACTICE THIS

Share with a friend the reasons you struggle to listen during conflict. Think together about strategies to help you remember to listen amid conflict.

LWF Dr. Adrian Rogers 

Heaven’s Relief in the Coming Wrath

God considers it just to repay with affliction those who afflict you, and to grant relief to you who are afflicted . . . when the Lord Jesus is revealed from heaven with his mighty angels in flaming fire, inflicting vengeance on those who do not know God and on those who do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. (2 Thessalonians 1:6–8)

There will come a time when the patience of God is over. When God has seen his people suffer for the allotted time, and the appointed number of martyrs is complete (Revelation 6:11), then a just and holy vengeance will come from heaven.

Notice that God’s vengeance on those who have afflicted his people is experienced by us as “relief.” “God considers it just to repay with affliction those who afflict you, and to grant relief to you who are afflicted.” In other words, the judgment on “those who afflict” us is a form of grace toward us.

Perhaps the most remarkable picture of judgment as grace is the picture of Babylon’s destruction in Revelation 18. At her destruction, a great voice from heaven cries, “Rejoice over her, O heaven, and you saints and apostles and prophets, for God has given judgment for you against her!” (Revelation 18:20). Then a great multitude is heard saying, “Hallelujah! Salvation and glory and power belong to our God, for his judgments are true and just; for he has judged the great prostitute who corrupted the earth with her immorality, and has avenged on her the blood of his servants” (Revelation 19:1–2).

When God’s patience has run its long-suffering course, and this age is over, and judgment comes on the enemies of God’s people, the saints will not disapprove of God’s justice.

This means that the final destruction of the unrepentant will not be experienced as a misery for God’s people.

The unwillingness of others to repent will not hold the affections of the saints hostage. Hell will not be able to blackmail heaven into misery. God’s judgment will be approved, and the saints will experience the vindication of truth as a great grace.

John Piper 

Heaven’s Relief in the Coming Wrath

God considers it just to repay with affliction those who afflict you, and to grant relief to you who are afflicted . . . when the Lord Jesus is revealed from heaven with his mighty angels in flaming fire, inflicting vengeance on those who do not know God and on those who do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. (2 Thessalonians 1:6–8)

There will come a time when the patience of God is over. When God has seen his people suffer for the allotted time, and the appointed number of martyrs is complete (Revelation 6:11), then a just and holy vengeance will come from heaven.

Notice that God’s vengeance on those who have afflicted his people is experienced by us as “relief.” “God considers it just to repay with affliction those who afflict you, and to grant relief to you who are afflicted.” In other words, the judgment on “those who afflict” us is a form of grace toward us.

Perhaps the most remarkable picture of judgment as grace is the picture of Babylon’s destruction in Revelation 18. At her destruction, a great voice from heaven cries, “Rejoice over her, O heaven, and you saints and apostles and prophets, for God has given judgment for you against her!” (Revelation 18:20). Then a great multitude is heard saying, “Hallelujah! Salvation and glory and power belong to our God, for his judgments are true and just; for he has judged the great prostitute who corrupted the earth with her immorality, and has avenged on her the blood of his servants” (Revelation 19:1–2).

When God’s patience has run its long-suffering course, and this age is over, and judgment comes on the enemies of God’s people, the saints will not disapprove of God’s justice.

This means that the final destruction of the unrepentant will not be experienced as a misery for God’s people.

The unwillingness of others to repent will not hold the affections of the saints hostage. Hell will not be able to blackmail heaven into misery. God’s judgment will be approved, and the saints will experience the vindication of truth as a great grace.

John Piper

You Think You Are Anonymous But You're Not

My mother always said "if you can't say something nice, then be quite". 

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never harm me"

No so, words cut you to your core.

They can tear down or build up.

Tear down definition 

To pull apart by force, cause distress

Build up definition 

Praise that boost confidence 

Faceless trolls on the internet are really nasty. 

They bully with words.

Their words cut deep wounds that bleed little bits of who you are.

Sadly, some people will carry the scars a life time.

Those who are insecure in who they are will suffer as if they were physically wounded.

Trolls viciously attack people for being different, in appearance, in looks and because you disagree with their view.

A troll is a person who thinks his deeds are hidden and he can spew his nastiness without repercussions.

They hide behind what they think is anonymity.

Trolls make a habit of spewing hate.

Some will graduate to being a bully.

They will use their fist to inflict suffering.

Their families will suffer.

What is wrong with their soul?

Is it bitterness, evil, inadequacy, stupidity or just foolishness? 

For sure, it is yielding to Satan and the destroying road of sin!

You will be held accountable!

The word of the Lord is very clear about your secrets and your careless words.

Lord, help us not to judge.

15 They show that the work of the law is written on their hearts, while their conscience also bears witness, and their conflicting thoughts accuse or even excuse them

16 on that day when, according to my gospel, God judges the secrets of men by Christ Jesus. - Romans 2:15-16

Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God. - 1 Corinthians 4:5

10 Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God;

11 for it is written, "As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God." 

12 So then each of us will give an account of himself to God. - Romans 14:10-12

35 The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil.

36 I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak,

37 for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned." - Matthew 12:35-37

There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.  - Proverbs 12:18

My soul is in the midst of lions; I lie down amid fiery beasts- the children of man, whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are sharp swords.  - Psalm 57:4

Be Angry and Sin Not

BIBLE MEDITATION:

“Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath.” Ephesians 4:26

DEVOTIONAL THOUGHT:

God’s Word tells us to be “slow to wrath” (Proverbs 14:29, James 1:19). There’s nothing that will do more damage to your relationships than unwanted, unwarranted anger. If you are given to anger, let me tell you a couple of things the Bible says, and it won’t be flattering.

First, the Bible says you are foolish. Ecclesiastes 7:9 says, “For anger resteth in the bosom of fools.” 

Second, you have a weak character. Proverbs 16:32 says, “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.” Uncontrolled anger is like throwing a rock into a wasp nest.

ACTION POINT:

Do you have a short fuse? If so, confess it to the Lord. Don’t let Satan get a stronghold in your life. If you get angry today, ask yourself, “What need is not being met?” Give that need to the Lord.

LWF Dr. Adrian Rogers